I have discovered paradise.
This place is like nothing I've ever seen before. Everything here seems almost designed for our comfort and well-being; even the very land itself is gentle and nurturing. Food is abundant; danger, nonexistent. It's never too hot or too cold; the rain is always soft and refreshing, and never falls on any of the numerous beaches.
A person could live here in perfect peace, without toil or conflict of any kind. Everything is safe and easy. There is nothing to kill for and nothing to die for.
I've got to get the hell out of here!